


Last Christmas

by whatareyousearchingfordean



Series: Dean Winchester One Shots [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Drinking, F/M, Implied Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-16
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-06-29 19:00:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19836532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whatareyousearchingfordean/pseuds/whatareyousearchingfordean
Summary: Maybe falling for a Winchester wasn’t the smartest thing to do.





	Last Christmas

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: Implied smut, angst, drinking
> 
> Yay Christmas! And angst! This was an entry for the lovely @winchester-writes (tumblr) Christmas challenge. This was fun to write! I live for angst! Obviously inspired by the ever amazing Wham song of the same title.

A crowded room. The bar was buzzing this Christmas Eve. Stupid Christmas music rang out through the speakers, annoying the already annoyed drinkers to the brink. Everybody sneered, and wrinkled their nose as they walked in and heard the disgustingly cheery music. Stockings hung from the shelf behind the bartender filled with various hard liqueurs. It was a poor excuse for Christmas decorations.

You spun the drink around in its glass, watching the minuscule droplets of amber liquid slide up and down the sides of the glass. How many glasses in? You had lost count as your mind had worked to drown out the music.

The door jingled as you motioned for the bartender to get you another. Your eyes flickered towards the door quickly, catching on the last person you would expect to see. Dean Winchester, the bastard, the man you had loved. You instantly made yourself small as he sauntered over to the bar down at the opposite end of you. Quickly you picked up the drink as the bartender set it in front of you and moved to an empty table in the back. You kept your eyes on him, making sure he didn’t see you as you slunk onto the stool. It’s been twelve months since you last saw Dean, eleven since you stopped trying to find him. An ache bubbled up in your chest and made your throat feel small. Half of you wanted to walk over to him, sitting confidently on his stool, and throw your drink in his face before slapping him across his cheek. The other half was immobilized where you were, willing him to never look your way.

~

**_*One week before Christmas, the year before*_ **

_“It’s always something isn’t it?” Dean had questioned. He ran his hands up and down his thighs thoughtfully. You turned on the couch next to him, pulling your thighs into your chest. The dank and dirty motel room was chilly. Dean rarely talked about things. His thoughts and feelings. But you knew the years were draining him. He wasn’t a perky 22 year old anymore. He had literally been to hell and back and it showed. “I mean, sometimes I just wished it would all stop, you know?” He turned to you. His big green eyes peering into you._

_This man just broke your heart. The crush you have had on him since day one felt heavy on your shoulders right now. Seeing him so down, tears threatening to spill over his eyelids, you knew you would do anything for him. You loved Dean Winchester, and you would give your life to him. Too bad he was oblivious._

_“Dean, you have saved the world. More than once I might add. You stood up to Michael, refusing the better good. You chose to save everyone instead of just taking the easy way out. Your time will come and you’ll be fine.” You placed a hand on his cheek reassuringly. He leaned into your palm and closed his eyes for a second. When he reopened them, you saw something flash across them before his lips connected with yours. The shock slipped away quickly, just happy this was finally happening. His mouth moving yours open, his tongue moving inside your mouth. The kiss was heavy, Dean’s hands roaming over yours hips and thighs. Unfortunately, he broke away. But when he stood up he dragged you up with him.Dean guided you to the bed and pulled you down into the sheets with him._

**_~_ **

When you had awoke the next morning, the bed was cold and empty next to you. A small piece of motel stationary was folded and propped up by your gun on the bedside table. Your name was scrawled across it in Dean’s familiar handwriting.

_Y/N, I’m sorry. Trust me when I say this is the best thing for you. People shouldn’t get close to me. This is the last time I’ll ever ruin your life, I promise. Please, go and live the normal life you and I both know you want and deserve._

_-Dean_

Obviously you tried to call him. But the emotionless voice on the other end informed you the number you had was no longer in service. You spent the next month trying to find him. To tell him you didn’t want a life if he wasn’t in it. It took two weeks for you to get a current number from other hunters. He didn’t answer of course, and at first you just pleaded for him to talk to you. But as the weeks passed by, the messages turned angry. _‘How dare you tell me how to live MY life?’_ and _‘You are such a coward of a man Dean Winchester, I take back what I said about you saving the world. You were nothing but a coward’._ Yeah, in your heart you knew it wasn’t true, but you were just so angry. Finally, you decided you had to let the anger go so you could get on with your life. But as soon as you let it slip away, the pain just snuck in and took its place. This Christmas season so far had been particularly hard, the snow and the lights all reminding you of the time your dream had come true, only to be ripped out right from underneath you.

You rose the glass to your lips again, savoring the sting of the whiskey in your throat. You dropped your head, chin falling into your chest and your shoulders fell into heap. Your nose began to sting as tears threatened to overflow down your cheeks. A sob formed in your chest and it took everything in you to not let it out. Why in the world did this man have so much power over you? When you finally looked back up, Dean had turned his head, his eyes locked on your small frame in the corner. Your heart skipped a beat under his intense look, and it was then that you realized, that if he chose to come over, you would melt back into his arms, even though every instinct in you was screaming for you to run. But if he didn’t, if he got up and left the bar, you would be reduced to sobbing mess in seconds. Dean held your gaze way too long. Neither of you turned away, afraid that if you did the other would disappear.

“You’re too pretty to be out drinking by yourself on Christmas Eve.” A deep voice broke your train of thought. The man stepped into your line of vision, partially obscuring Dean. You looked up at him. He was handsome for sure, but nothing compared to the Winchester at the bar. And he was obviously just as fucked up as you, out drinking alone at a bar on Christmas Eve. Your eyes fluttered back to Dean for a second, seeing the look of shock, and something else flash across his face. Jealousy, maybe? It was then that you knew you had to take a stand. The stranger sat two tall skinny glasses filled with some red mixed drink with a single cherry resting on top of the ice in the table. He slid one towards you slightly and took a sip of the other. You narrowed your eyes and plucked the cherry from the glass. In the most, outlandishly over seductive way, you sucked the cherry into your mouth, your full lips wrapping around it carefully. You popped the stem and leaned into the man standing just inches from you, slamming a wet kiss to his lips, making it last longer than necessary. 

“Let’s get outta here.” You whispered into his ear before reaching behind you for your coat. He gulped and nodded, obviously surprised by your reaction. You tangled your fingers around his wrist and dragged him out of the bar, keeping your eyes trained away from Dean. You could feel the heat of his stare on your back as the door loudly slammed behind you. 


End file.
